Thankfully work has calmed down since my last post.  I’m clocking about 40 hours a week again and I’m able to spend more time at home, but I’m also craving horrible, terrible, non-diabetic foods.

For the most part I’ve been able to keep my bread and candy cravings under control, but the other day I walked past the employee lounge and saw the most delicious looking loaves of bread I’d ever seen.  I knew I should have just kept walking.  I wasn’t even really hungry, but they smelled so good.  So I grabbed one, sliced it in half and toasted it with some cheese.  It was delicious, and I truly enjoyed every bite, but of course my BS spiked afterwards, stayed high through dinner.  For the rest of the day I felt guilty and crappy.

The next day a co-worker brought in a giant tub of Jelly Beans.  The old me would have been all over that, keeping a steady flow of jelly beans at my desk throughout the day.  This time however, I restrained… a bit.  I noticed my blood sugar was trending down and registering at about 107.  I could have had a clementine, or a couple strawberries and been fine.  In fact I keep a little insulated lunch bag at my desk filled with goodies in case my sugar does start dropping, but no, I grabbed a handful of Jelly beans and watched at my BS shot up.

The other night my husband and I decided to see a movie we’ve been wanting to see for a while, The Grand Budapest Hotel.  It was fantastic.  Very entertaining and we both really enjoyed it.  What wasn’t fantastic though was how much popcorn I consumed.  The last time we went to a movie I didn’t know how many carbs were in  popcorn so I just didn’t give myself insulin for it.  Stupid, I know, but this was also before I decided to take back control of my diabetes and work towards bringing down my a1c.  At that point, I didn’t really care.  This time I gave myself insulin for 30g of carbs and vowed to not overdo it.  That went out the window when I realized I had consumed almost the entire Small popcorn all by myself.  Not only that, but my insulin pump ran out of insulin during the middle of the movie.  As soon as I got home I changed my pump, but the damage was done.  For the rest of the night I was restless, got up to pee about 4 or 5 times and woke up feeling crappy…again.

So yesterday I decided to only eat healthy foods, count every single carb and learn from my small setback.  Sean and I both had the day off so we slept in, made a delicious and healthy breakfast of scrambled eggs with green pepper and onion.  We relaxed at the beach for a few hours, made chicken sandwiches and brought fruit and water.  No candy for me.  Dinner was one of my now favorite meals, grilled eggplant with provolone.  We had a really great day off together.  It felt like a mini vacation, and I feel wonderful.